Sunday, 18 July 2021

[ the lockdown diaries ]

After three weeks already of this situation, everyone is tired, everyone is scared, and everyone is very, very bored.

So, as we embark on yet another lockdown, a harder lockdown, a lockdown with greater restrictions, higher levels of police presence, and surprisingly consistent panic buying, I want you all to remember one thing; it's the same lockdown, really. 

Nothing has changed. It's Groundhog Day for all of us. Again. Except we're doing it together, in some sort of weird, group hallucination, déjà vu...thing. 

In effort to keep us all sane (read = myself), it's important to review your actions, keep up a routine, be mindful, and take every day as it comes...

For example, I only washed my hair for the first time in 3 days today. I hadn't quite felt up to the mammoth task grooming the Disney locks entails, though it seems I probably should have got to it sooner; I found toothpaste on the ends, and vegemite on my ear. Disturbingly, I haven't eaten vegemite for a month. 

Moving on. 

It's also vital you try to keep track of times, dates, and familiar items to retain some sense of normalcy in your surroundings and avoid unnecessary distress. Like last Thursday, when I asked Mum where I left my glasses. Four times. In an hour. While in a Zoom meeting. 

Obviously, I was wearing them.

Letting yourself become complacent about things is a slippery slope to losing the feeling of control. Though, do remember, don't hold the reins so tightly you let stress drive the cart, as it were.

(Let's just let me have that metaphor, shall we? Otherwise you're in for all sorts of horse-related jokes, and I'm not that funny)

Diet, or more clearly, food habits, are a good way to gauge how you're coping during the days and weeks that roll together. 

Hypothetically, eating a large bag of chips, half a tub of salsa, a boiled egg and 3 Babybels, while watching the microwave cook my - ehem - your second lunch for the day, probably isn't the best choice you can make. 

Exercise is a simply brilliant way to keep fit, healthy, and mentally blow the cobwebs away. It is allowed under the restrictions, and I cannot recommend enough a good walk in your local area (yes, alright, the only place we're allowed to go, but still). You may even see someone you can say a quick hello to. Socially distant and safe, of course.

Went for a walk around the block just the other day, in fact. I talked to Roger, Darcy, the little family down the road, and my friend, Marvin. 

Admittedly, Roger and Darcy are what we call our cars, the little family happen to be a noisy, slightly territorial and vicious murder of crows, and Marvin is a futuristic-looking lamp in a lighting store on Canterbury Road.

(As in, Marvin the paranoid android? Anyone?)

Beside the point, however. Exercise is healthy! Anyway. 

As we all now have reasonably persistent, crippling anxiety as a standard, it borders on self-indulgent to let yourself get carried away. One must stop gnashing our teeth, throwing our hands up in frustration, and crying in the kitchen. Or the back garden. Or the loungeroom. 

If nothing else, that's very amateur; ugly crying should only ever be done in the shower, obviously. And, seeing as you're trying to save tissues for the inevitable toilet paper shortage, you've a lot of washing to get done after ruining the sleeves of at least 5 jumpers with snot on them. 

Stay informed during the lockdown! Do not fall prey to online gossip forums, covid deniers, and rubbish you read on facebook. 

There's a pressor every day at 11, which is a good time to have a morning tea break and chat to Gladys, Kerry, and Gary Worboys. Full of helpful(ish), straightforward(ish), and clear (ok, yes, alright, not so much) information, at least this is the most direct route to keep yourself abreast of current updates. 

That being said, be aware of the waffler who can put you to sleep in his first sentence (Hazmat? Hazsn't? Hazbeen?). But apparently he shakes the routine up a bit by blithely greeting random journalists in the middle of critical updates, and repetitively using 90's lingo such as whacko, so it's possible I'm the only one who finds him incompetent, unprofessional, and a dipstick. 


Remember fam, we're all in this together. I don't say that blithely or sarcastically, or mean it any other way than exactly as said. We can't do alone, we all have to work together, and we all have to get through this as best we can under the circumstances we've been given. We have to behave, we have to follow the rules, and we have to keep doing that for as long as it takes to get to a place where we can all be safe. 

That being said, nobody is negating how hard this all is. Take care of yourself and take care of your loved ones, even as that means not seeing them. 

In the meantime, stay safe, stay sane, get some sun if you can. 

And pass the 1kg bucket of hummos, please.